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Show Notes
It's Not Just the Thing - It's All the Things
Episode 1 (August 4, 2025)
In this conversation, we discuss the complexities of managing school supplies and the mental load that comes with parenting. We explore the shared responsibilities in relationships, the importance of ownership in tasks, and the overwhelming nature of juggling family duties. The discussion highlights the need for effective communication and collaboration between partners to alleviate the mental load and create a balanced family dynamic.
In this conversation, we discuss the complexities of managing school supplies and the mental load that comes with parenting. We explore the shared responsibilities in relationships, the importance of ownership in tasks, and the overwhelming nature of juggling family duties. The discussion highlights the need for effective communication and collaboration between partners to alleviate the mental load and create a balanced family dynamic.
Playing Fair: Our First Attempt at Rebalancing the Mental Load
Episode 2 (August 4, 2025)
In this conversation, we explore the Fair Play card deck, which aims to facilitate equitable partnerships in household responsibilities. We discuss various tasks related to home management, meal planning, childcare, and the mental load associated with these responsibilities. The dialogue emphasizes the importance of collaboration, communication, and the need for check-ins to ensure a balanced division of labor in the household.
In this conversation, we explore the Fair Play card deck, which aims to facilitate equitable partnerships in household responsibilities. We discuss various tasks related to home management, meal planning, childcare, and the mental load associated with these responsibilities. The dialogue emphasizes the importance of collaboration, communication, and the need for check-ins to ensure a balanced division of labor in the household.
The Mental Load at Midnight
Episode 3 (August 4, 2025)
In this conversation, we explore the Fair Play deck, a tool designed to foster equitable partnerships in family dynamics. We discuss the importance of shared responsibilities in meal preparation, the management of adult friendships, and the mental load associated with birthday celebrations. We also address the challenges of discipline and screen time, the coordination of extended family relationships, and the significance of gestures of love. We explore various aspects of family life, including holiday traditions, parenting challenges, and the dynamics of our interfaith marriage. We also delve into the responsibilities of marriage and romance, the challenges of nighttime parenting, and the significance of participating in our children's activities. We touch on the often-overlooked task of sending thank you notes, the logistics of watching kids, and finally, the magical traditions of childhood.
In this conversation, we explore the Fair Play deck, a tool designed to foster equitable partnerships in family dynamics. We discuss the importance of shared responsibilities in meal preparation, the management of adult friendships, and the mental load associated with birthday celebrations. We also address the challenges of discipline and screen time, the coordination of extended family relationships, and the significance of gestures of love. We explore various aspects of family life, including holiday traditions, parenting challenges, and the dynamics of our interfaith marriage. We also delve into the responsibilities of marriage and romance, the challenges of nighttime parenting, and the significance of participating in our children's activities. We touch on the often-overlooked task of sending thank you notes, the logistics of watching kids, and finally, the magical traditions of childhood.
Dimmer Down on Caring
Episode 4 (August 11, 2025)
This week, we continue through the Fair Play deck by Eve Rodsky to see how our family’s responsibilities stack up — and who’s really holding the cards. From civic duties to cultural outings, travel plans to kids’ activities, we talk through what’s working, what’s… not, and how we can better share the load. It’s part strategy session, part reality check, and a whole lot of honest conversation about making home life feel fairer for both of us.
This week, we continue through the Fair Play deck by Eve Rodsky to see how our family’s responsibilities stack up — and who’s really holding the cards. From civic duties to cultural outings, travel plans to kids’ activities, we talk through what’s working, what’s… not, and how we can better share the load. It’s part strategy session, part reality check, and a whole lot of honest conversation about making home life feel fairer for both of us.
Wild: Navigating Life’s Unpredictable Moments
Episode 5 (August 18, 2025)
This week, we tackle the “Wild” section of the Fair Play deck — the grab bag of unpredictable life events that can shake up a household.
We explore:
Loss & grief: Navigating pet loss with compassion for kids and each other.
Home renovations: From crown molding to unplanned demo days (sometimes while still in work clothes).
Daily disruptions: The “glitch in the matrix” moments when plans go out the window.
Serious illness: Sharing responsibilities when a loved one (human or furry) needs extra care.
Job loss & money stress: Why transparency and teamwork matter in tough times.
Moving: Logistics vs. brute force — and which moves we’d never do again.
Parenting in the first year: Why every baby’s arrival is its own unique challenge.
Through laughter, a few cringe-worthy memories, and candid conversation, we show how the unpredictable moments often bring out our best teamwork — and why the real challenge is in the daily grind, not the emergencies.
This week, we tackle the “Wild” section of the Fair Play deck — the grab bag of unpredictable life events that can shake up a household.
We explore:
Loss & grief: Navigating pet loss with compassion for kids and each other.
Home renovations: From crown molding to unplanned demo days (sometimes while still in work clothes).
Daily disruptions: The “glitch in the matrix” moments when plans go out the window.
Serious illness: Sharing responsibilities when a loved one (human or furry) needs extra care.
Job loss & money stress: Why transparency and teamwork matter in tough times.
Moving: Logistics vs. brute force — and which moves we’d never do again.
Parenting in the first year: Why every baby’s arrival is its own unique challenge.
Through laughter, a few cringe-worthy memories, and candid conversation, we show how the unpredictable moments often bring out our best teamwork — and why the real challenge is in the daily grind, not the emergencies.
Cheese Pizza, Goody Bags, and Chaos: The Mental Load of Kids’ Parties
Episode 6 (August 25, 2025)
In this episode of the Mental Load Chronicles, the hosts dive into the complexities of planning a child's birthday party. They discuss essential elements such as themes, guest lists, food choices, and the mental load that comes with organizing such events. The conversation highlights the importance of managing expectations, collecting RSVPs, and the challenges of catering to children's preferences. The hosts also explore creative ideas for party favors and the significance of simplifying the planning process to reduce stress.
In this episode of the Mental Load Chronicles, the hosts dive into the complexities of planning a child's birthday party. They discuss essential elements such as themes, guest lists, food choices, and the mental load that comes with organizing such events. The conversation highlights the importance of managing expectations, collecting RSVPs, and the challenges of catering to children's preferences. The hosts also explore creative ideas for party favors and the significance of simplifying the planning process to reduce stress.
Burrows, Bangs, and Balayage: Navigating the Caregiving Deck
Episode 7 (September 1, 2025)
In this episode of the Mental Load Chronicles, we explore the complexities of caregiving responsibilities within our family. We discuss the Fair Play deck as a tool for managing household tasks, share humorous anecdotes about haircuts and grooming challenges, and emphasize the importance of communication in alleviating mental load. The conversation also touches on topics such as birth control, bedtime routines, clothing management for kids, dental care, and the dynamics of social media and friendships among our children.
In this episode of the Mental Load Chronicles, we explore the complexities of caregiving responsibilities within our family. We discuss the Fair Play deck as a tool for managing household tasks, share humorous anecdotes about haircuts and grooming challenges, and emphasize the importance of communication in alleviating mental load. The conversation also touches on topics such as birth control, bedtime routines, clothing management for kids, dental care, and the dynamics of social media and friendships among our children.
Before They Say “I Do”: The Mental Load of Taylor & Travis
Episode 8 (September 8, 2025)
What happens when pop culture’s biggest power couple collides with the everyday realities of marriage and mental load? In this episode, we use Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s whirlwind romance as a springboard to unpack the conversations every couple should have before tying the knot.
From dividing household labor, balancing career demands, and navigating money and kids, to making time for each other when life gets hectic — we share what we wish someone had handed us as a “marriage playbook.”
Whether you’re a Swiftie, a Chiefs fan, or just someone trying to balance your own household chaos, this episode is packed with relatable insights.
What happens when pop culture’s biggest power couple collides with the everyday realities of marriage and mental load? In this episode, we use Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s whirlwind romance as a springboard to unpack the conversations every couple should have before tying the knot.
From dividing household labor, balancing career demands, and navigating money and kids, to making time for each other when life gets hectic — we share what we wish someone had handed us as a “marriage playbook.”
Whether you’re a Swiftie, a Chiefs fan, or just someone trying to balance your own household chaos, this episode is packed with relatable insights.
Homework, Vet Bills & the Mental Load of Family Life
Episode 9 (September 15, 2025)
In this episode of The Mental Load Chronicles, we continue exploring the caregiving portion of the Fair Play deck—this time focusing on the realities of pet care, parenting, medical needs, and school responsibilities.
From managing a beloved pet’s cancer treatments to dealing with homework, school transitions, and never-ending paperwork, they unpack how these responsibilities add up to create an invisible but very real mental load. The discussion also touches on estate planning, life insurance, self-care, and communication strategies for balancing family life.
In this episode of The Mental Load Chronicles, we continue exploring the caregiving portion of the Fair Play deck—this time focusing on the realities of pet care, parenting, medical needs, and school responsibilities.
From managing a beloved pet’s cancer treatments to dealing with homework, school transitions, and never-ending paperwork, they unpack how these responsibilities add up to create an invisible but very real mental load. The discussion also touches on estate planning, life insurance, self-care, and communication strategies for balancing family life.
Dad's First Time in Charge: Birthday Party Mental Load Recap
Episode 10 (September 22, 2025)
In this episode of The Mental Load Chronicles, we dive into what happened when Dad took full responsibility for planning our son’s birthday party—for the very first time.
From scrambling for contact info and navigating RSVPs, to forgotten candles, late-night Target runs, and the chaos of seven laser-tag-hyped kids, we unpack the invisible labor that goes into pulling off a “simple” birthday party.
You’ll hear what surprised him, what felt easier than expected, and where the biggest mental load moments showed up. Plus, we share reactions from other parents and some hacks that might just save your next party.
This one’s about more than pizza and balloons—it’s about the shift in perspective that happens when the mental load transfers, even for just one event.
In this episode of The Mental Load Chronicles, we dive into what happened when Dad took full responsibility for planning our son’s birthday party—for the very first time.
From scrambling for contact info and navigating RSVPs, to forgotten candles, late-night Target runs, and the chaos of seven laser-tag-hyped kids, we unpack the invisible labor that goes into pulling off a “simple” birthday party.
You’ll hear what surprised him, what felt easier than expected, and where the biggest mental load moments showed up. Plus, we share reactions from other parents and some hacks that might just save your next party.
This one’s about more than pizza and balloons—it’s about the shift in perspective that happens when the mental load transfers, even for just one event.
Two Weeks, Four Backpacks, Seven Countries: The Mental Load of Travel Planning
Episode 11 (September 29, 2025)
In this first episode of our three-part Travel with Five series, we dive into the mental load of travel planning. From researching flights a year in advance to sprinting through train stations with three kids, we unpack what it really takes to pull off a two-week, seven-country European adventure.
You’ll hear:
Why backpacks > suitcases when traveling in Europe
What went wrong (oversold trains, closed attractions, rental car chaos in Paris)
How balancing kids’ preferences adds to the invisible work of trip planning
The small steps that make the biggest difference in reducing stress
Whether you’re dreaming of your first big family trip or just trying to plan the next vacation, this episode is packed with travel hacks, lessons learned, and honest stories about the mental load behind the magic.
In this first episode of our three-part Travel with Five series, we dive into the mental load of travel planning. From researching flights a year in advance to sprinting through train stations with three kids, we unpack what it really takes to pull off a two-week, seven-country European adventure.
You’ll hear:
Why backpacks > suitcases when traveling in Europe
What went wrong (oversold trains, closed attractions, rental car chaos in Paris)
How balancing kids’ preferences adds to the invisible work of trip planning
The small steps that make the biggest difference in reducing stress
Whether you’re dreaming of your first big family trip or just trying to plan the next vacation, this episode is packed with travel hacks, lessons learned, and honest stories about the mental load behind the magic.
Two Weeks, Four Backpacks, Seven Countries: How We Packed
Episode 12 (October 6, 2025)
Packing is never just about clothes—it’s about anticipating every scenario, lightening the mental load, and making sure the whole family can actually enjoy the trip. In this episode of The Mental Load Chronicles, we share how we packed for a two-week, seven-country European adventure with three kids… using just four backpacks.
From building a DIY medical kit with a label maker, to outsmarting cobblestones with backpacks instead of rolling suitcases, to improvising with Pringles cans to protect fragile souvenirs, we unpack the invisible work behind getting ready for travel.
Packing is never just about clothes—it’s about anticipating every scenario, lightening the mental load, and making sure the whole family can actually enjoy the trip. In this episode of The Mental Load Chronicles, we share how we packed for a two-week, seven-country European adventure with three kids… using just four backpacks.
From building a DIY medical kit with a label maker, to outsmarting cobblestones with backpacks instead of rolling suitcases, to improvising with Pringles cans to protect fragile souvenirs, we unpack the invisible work behind getting ready for travel.
Two Weeks, Four Backpacks, Seven Countries: Running Uphill With a Toddler on Your Back
Episode 13 (October 13, 2025)
You planned it, packed it, and somehow still ended up carrying the toddler uphill to a castle.
In this week’s episode — Two Weeks, Four Backpacks, Seven Countries: Running Uphill With a Toddler on Your Back — we wrap up our travel trilogy by unpacking what it really takes to “relax” on vacation when you’re the family trip planner.
From hangry moments at Epcot to surprise injuries in Bavaria, we share the real, unfiltered mental load of traveling as a family — and how to make your next trip a little lighter (and a lot more fun).
You planned it, packed it, and somehow still ended up carrying the toddler uphill to a castle.
In this week’s episode — Two Weeks, Four Backpacks, Seven Countries: Running Uphill With a Toddler on Your Back — we wrap up our travel trilogy by unpacking what it really takes to “relax” on vacation when you’re the family trip planner.
From hangry moments at Epcot to surprise injuries in Bavaria, we share the real, unfiltered mental load of traveling as a family — and how to make your next trip a little lighter (and a lot more fun).
How to Talk About the Mental Load Without Starting a Fight
Episode 14 (October 19, 2025)
If you’ve ever tried to talk about the mental load and ended up in a full-blown argument — this one’s for you. We’ve been there. More than once. In this episode, we get brutally honest about what didn’t work (spoiler: “you never do anything” is not a winning opener) and what finally did. It’s equal parts laughter, therapy flashbacks, and practical advice for anyone who’s ever reached their breaking point over the mental load. It’s real, raw, and maybe a little too relatable. Whether you’re newly married or decades in, this is the roadmap for having that first “mental load talk” — calmly, constructively, and with hope.
If you’ve ever tried to talk about the mental load and ended up in a full-blown argument — this one’s for you. We’ve been there. More than once. In this episode, we get brutally honest about what didn’t work (spoiler: “you never do anything” is not a winning opener) and what finally did. It’s equal parts laughter, therapy flashbacks, and practical advice for anyone who’s ever reached their breaking point over the mental load. It’s real, raw, and maybe a little too relatable. Whether you’re newly married or decades in, this is the roadmap for having that first “mental load talk” — calmly, constructively, and with hope.
Tiny Shifts, Big Changes: The Mental Load Check-In (Part 1)
Episode 15 (October 27, 2025)
In this candid check-in, we talk about how things are really going as we try to share the mental load. From garlic confusion and weekend dinners to birthday parties and even an unexpected ER visit, this episode unpacks the tiny shifts that add up to big changes.
We get real about what’s working, what still feels heavy, and how learning to let go — and let your partner actually help — can be life-changing in the smallest ways. It’s messy, funny, and maybe a little too relatable.
In this candid check-in, we talk about how things are really going as we try to share the mental load. From garlic confusion and weekend dinners to birthday parties and even an unexpected ER visit, this episode unpacks the tiny shifts that add up to big changes.
We get real about what’s working, what still feels heavy, and how learning to let go — and let your partner actually help — can be life-changing in the smallest ways. It’s messy, funny, and maybe a little too relatable.
The Slow Work of Sharing the Load — Picking Up Where We Left Off
Episode 16 (November 3, 2025)
If last week was about awareness, this week is about action — and continuing a conversation too good to rush.
In Episode 15, we started unpacking what it really takes to share the mental load. The dialogue ran deep, so instead of cutting it short, we kept going — because our listeners deserved to hear the full story.
This week, we pick up right where we left off: talking about accountability, self-understanding, and how defining success at home can be just as important (and complicated) as defining it at work. There’s reflection, laughter, and yes… even a fantasy football analogy that somehow makes perfect sense.
If you’re somewhere between knowing things need to change and figuring out how to make that happen — this one’s for you.
If last week was about awareness, this week is about action — and continuing a conversation too good to rush.
In Episode 15, we started unpacking what it really takes to share the mental load. The dialogue ran deep, so instead of cutting it short, we kept going — because our listeners deserved to hear the full story.
This week, we pick up right where we left off: talking about accountability, self-understanding, and how defining success at home can be just as important (and complicated) as defining it at work. There’s reflection, laughter, and yes… even a fantasy football analogy that somehow makes perfect sense.
If you’re somewhere between knowing things need to change and figuring out how to make that happen — this one’s for you.
Because Apparently Retainers Can Be 911 Emergencies
Episode 17 (November 10, 2025)
One minute your kid’s supposed to be asleep. The next, you’re calling 911 because her retainer is stuck in her throat.
In this episode, we share what really happened — the chaos, the calm, the fire truck in our driveway — and what it taught us about dividing the mental load when life takes a sharp left turn. From staying calm under pressure to learning when to just let go (literally), this is a story about teamwork, panic, parenting, and the weirdest bedtime emergency ever.
It’s the ultimate reminder that even when life gets messy — and drooly — you can get through it together.
One minute your kid’s supposed to be asleep. The next, you’re calling 911 because her retainer is stuck in her throat.
In this episode, we share what really happened — the chaos, the calm, the fire truck in our driveway — and what it taught us about dividing the mental load when life takes a sharp left turn. From staying calm under pressure to learning when to just let go (literally), this is a story about teamwork, panic, parenting, and the weirdest bedtime emergency ever.
It’s the ultimate reminder that even when life gets messy — and drooly — you can get through it together.
Gift Giving Without the Drama (or the Vacuum): The Mental Load of Making It Mean Something
Episode 18 (November 17, 2025)
This week, we’re talking about the mental load of gift giving — and how to make it meaningful without the guilt, pressure, or drama.
From the emotional labor of shopping, wrapping, and remembering everyone’s favorites, to the art of giving gifts that actually land, we’re sharing our best hits (and a few epic misses — looking at you, “urine-be-gone”).
We’ll walk through ideas for gifts that say “I see you” — from Fair Play bundles to self-care packages, stress-free travel plans, and even fitness gifts that don’t backfire — all designed to help couples reconnect and rebalance during the holidays.
This week, we’re talking about the mental load of gift giving — and how to make it meaningful without the guilt, pressure, or drama.
From the emotional labor of shopping, wrapping, and remembering everyone’s favorites, to the art of giving gifts that actually land, we’re sharing our best hits (and a few epic misses — looking at you, “urine-be-gone”).
We’ll walk through ideas for gifts that say “I see you” — from Fair Play bundles to self-care packages, stress-free travel plans, and even fitness gifts that don’t backfire — all designed to help couples reconnect and rebalance during the holidays.
Getting to Know Us… Because Apparently We Forgot to Introduce Ourselves
Episode 19 (November 24, 2025)
This Thanksgiving week, we’re doing something a little different. Guided by our teenage daughter, we sat down for a real “getting to know us” Q&A.
In this heartfelt conversation, we reflect on 21 years of marriage, raising three kids across three very different life stages, our career paths, our hopes for the future, and the gifts of the “good old days” we’re living in right now. Along the way, you’ll hear the true story of how we ended up getting married in South Korea, why the proposal is still a running joke, and what it feels like watching our oldest prepare to leave for college.
It’s honest, funny, unexpectedly emotional — and a sweet reminder of why we started The Mental Load Chronicles in the first place: to tell the truth about family life, partnership, and the moments that make us who we are.
This Thanksgiving week, we’re doing something a little different. Guided by our teenage daughter, we sat down for a real “getting to know us” Q&A.
In this heartfelt conversation, we reflect on 21 years of marriage, raising three kids across three very different life stages, our career paths, our hopes for the future, and the gifts of the “good old days” we’re living in right now. Along the way, you’ll hear the true story of how we ended up getting married in South Korea, why the proposal is still a running joke, and what it feels like watching our oldest prepare to leave for college.
It’s honest, funny, unexpectedly emotional — and a sweet reminder of why we started The Mental Load Chronicles in the first place: to tell the truth about family life, partnership, and the moments that make us who we are.
The December Check-In: Hanukkah Oil, Present Wrapping, and Who’s Putting Up the Tree?
Episode 20 (December 1, 2025)
In this pre-holiday episode, we ask each other quick-hit questions about the holidays: what we dread, what overwhelms us, which traditions matter, and where we inevitably stumble into marriage dynamics.
We talk about the chaos of decorating, the emotional weight of making the season “magical,” the guilt around traditions, the blessing and burnout of family expectations, and what it feels like to navigate this season in an interfaith home.
Whether you’re juggling latkes, wrapping paper, overloaded calendars, or kids who just really need a cuddle — you’ll hear pieces of your own December in this conversation.
Plus: We want your rapid-fire answers! Email us or tag us on Instagram — your moments, meltdowns, and wins help us keep this movement going.
In this pre-holiday episode, we ask each other quick-hit questions about the holidays: what we dread, what overwhelms us, which traditions matter, and where we inevitably stumble into marriage dynamics.
We talk about the chaos of decorating, the emotional weight of making the season “magical,” the guilt around traditions, the blessing and burnout of family expectations, and what it feels like to navigate this season in an interfaith home.
Whether you’re juggling latkes, wrapping paper, overloaded calendars, or kids who just really need a cuddle — you’ll hear pieces of your own December in this conversation.
Plus: We want your rapid-fire answers! Email us or tag us on Instagram — your moments, meltdowns, and wins help us keep this movement going.
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